The Art of Stealing Food
by WishingDreamer5
Summary: Or with other words: How Fred and George infiltrated Hogwarts's kitchen and caused chaos. Then again, it had only been a matter of time before those two would find out about everything...


**A/N: This was actually supposed to be up a year ago. -_-' Talk about procrastination. It's a sequel of "Of Parchments and Maps." You don't have to read that first to understand this, but it might be more fun that way. And if you spot any (stupid) errors, please don't hesitate to tell me. Written for XxX-SparklingEyes-XxX. Happy birthday! *heart* Enjoy! :)**

**Thanks: xX Ashlyn Malfoy Xx, my awesome beta. :)**

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~ _"Oh, you can get anything you want, Sir, anything!" _~

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Fred groaned when his stomach growled once again, claiming his attention. "Hurry up already, my stomach demands some food," he said jokingly. "Where is food when you need it? And why is the kitchen so far away?"

"I think that's so people like us, you know, people who are up to no good, won't find it that easily and cause chaos," his brother replied smartly, before fixing his eyes back to the Marauder's map.

"You've got a point there."

The twin brothers descended the marble staircase that would lead them to the Great Hall. Instead of going there, however, they turned left. The first thing they noticed was the fact that they were the only ones here.

"As strange as this sounds... I've never been here before," George admitted after a short while.

Fred hummed, thoughtfully. "Me neither. If only we had found this map earlier..."

"You're only saying that because of the food, aren't you?"

Fred opened his mouth to reply, but once again, his stomach beat him to the punch and it growled angrily. A quiet beat passed between them, before both brothers started to snicker simultaneously.

"I think that just proved my point."

Soon enough, they reached a stone staircase and descended that, too. To their great surprise, instead of seeing a dreary, underground tunnel, much like the tunnel that lead them to Snape's creepy dungeon, they noticed that they were in a wide stone corridor, which was brightly lit by torches and decorated with cheerful-looking still lifes of all kinds of food. So judging from those paintings, they were in fact close to the kitchen.

"Well, this is a rather nice change of atmosphere," Fred noted, taking in his surroundings with mild interest.

"Couldn't agree more with you, Fred... Stop. We're right there."

Both stopped walking. They looked up and met a painting of an enormous silver-colored bowl with fruit in it; a banana, apples, a pear and grapes.

"Now what?" Fred asked, looking at his brother.

George looked back to the map again and replied, surprise evident in his voice, "It says... that you have to tickle the pear."

"...Seriously?"

The redhead shrugged and just did that with his index finger. Surprisingly enough, the green pear giggled and started to flounce, before suddenly turning into a big, green doorknob. With a triumpant look, Fred grabbed it, pulled it open and stepped inside the room behind the painting.

As it happened, they came out in a huge room with a high ceiling. It seemed to be just as large as the Great Hall itself, with masses of gleaming copper pots and pans on the stone walls, and a huge brick chimney on the other side. The brothers, both stunned at this point, slowly headed towards the middle of the kitchen, where four long wooden tables were standing. George saw that their position was exactly under the four house tables in the Great Hall, one floor above them. There was even a table where the professors would be sitting. All of the tables were filled with extremely tasty food, from delicous rice dishes and different kinds of soup, to mouth-watering raspberry treacle tart. In less than an hour they would be sent through the ceiling to their counterparts in the Great Hall. The smell that drifted toward them almost drove them mad and Fred's stomach let out a long, whiny growl, almost as though it was demanding more food.

"This is quite interesting," Fred mumbled, ignoring his stomach, but sniffing in the scent deeply.

There were at least a hundred elves in the kitchen. All of them smiled friendly, nodded and even squatted whenever the zealous creatures came past them. They all wore the same uniform, too, which consisted of a cloth with the sign of Hogwarts engraved on it. They seemed to wear the cloth in the same kind of fashion; like a robe.

"House-elves... Of course! Why didn't we think of this before?" George muttered, taking in his surroundings in great awe.

That sure explained a lot of things; like how the whole castle looked spic and span every single day, from the Great Hall to all the dormitories. Well, they couldn't speak for the other houses, but _their_ dormitories always looked neat. Even the beds were made. This place was simply too huge to be taken care of by Filch alone, or even with the little help of some magic (which, by the way, shouldn't be expected from the janitor. They now knew that). And then the fire places that never seemed to go out. That just had to be the work of these House-elves. And they were doing a great job. So great that nobody even knew that they were here, just like it was supposed to be.

As soon as George had said that, one of them headed the twin's way and looked up at them hopefully. He asked, "Can Dotty help you, Sirs?"

"Dotty, could we have some food? I'm practically starving," Fred replied, without giving it a second thought.

"What would you like to have, Sirs?"

"Uhm..." Fred exchanged a look with George, not thinking that it would be this easy to get what he wanted, before asking, "What do you have?"

"Oh, you can get anything you want, Sir, anything!"

This brought a wide grin to the boy's face and his eyes shimmered mischievously. "Anything? Well, in that case... we take _everything_!"

It could be just Fred, but it seemed that they had stumbled upon Heaven itself. Heaven had excellent service, he had to admit that.

"Yes, Sir!"

At once, six of the magical creatures hurried their way to give them "everything." They held a large silver tray with cups, a teapot, a milk jug and a large scale with different cookies, delectable cream puffs and much, much more mouthwatering snacks.

"Wow, that sure was fast," George noted, utterly amazed at their speed.

This made the elves smile. They bowed deeply for him and withdrew quietly.

"Hey, I was wondering, is it alright if we come here more often from now on?" Fred wondered, looking at the House-elf that had approached them first. "You know, when we run out of food."

George chuckled, catching what he was on right away. "Having big plans, brother?"

"Why, of course! We would be happy if you could come and visit us more often, Sirs! You are always welcome to ask for our service," one of the nearby House-elves cried, enthusiastically.

"Well, then that's a deal," Fred promised solemnly.

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**A/N: Gotta love those two. I would be flattered if you could give me your opinion on this. :)**


End file.
